Adjusting Back

It is an incredibly strange feeling to come back to my home country, yet feel out of place. After not seeing America for 6 months and living in Oxford for about 9 months, my perspective has completely shifted. I now think of America as one country among many, with its respective strengths and problems. I compare a lot of my experiences here with those that I had abroad. I compare the professors I work with and the friends that I hang out with to those I had in the UK.

I did not feel this way at all when I came home for Christmas, but now I am more used to the Oxford way of life than the Northwestern way. I wonder how people get along without tutorials, formal halls, and bops. I question whether people are analyzing carefully enough before they speak and am always thinking about other points they could consider. Also, I am a little bit worried about being able to relate with all my friends now that I've been gone so long.

On the plane ride home, I watched an episode of 30 Rock (a comedy TV show) where Tracy Morgan struggles to relate with his former peers now that he is a TV star. I started to wonder whether something similar would happen to me - I've had so many different experiences this year that my friends haven't had. Fortunately, I have gotten to spend time with a good number of friends since getting back, and they are all really excited to hear about my year abroad. It is a little awkward because they don't always have a lot to say when I share stories (and maybe I talk about Oxford too much), but we can talk about this summer/the future if the conversation gets too one-sided.

My final worry is that the elitism that surrounds Oxford will make people treat me differently. Some people think that by attending an elite university you reach some level that other humans don't. Well, I agree that Oxford does a good job at facilitating the learning process, but that's the extent of it. I believe it is wrong in any case to say that one person is better than another, and this is no exception. I simply feel very fortunate to have learned/lived in such a cool place for a year. Life is a journey and a gradual process of discovery - going to a certain school does not make you exempt from that process.